Agent Rhinestone can’t help but be a bit worried about what will happen to Pee Wee (her 7 pound chihuahua) when the baby arrives this August. Rhinestone and Wee are so close. They spend 24 hours a day physically joined.
8:00am Rhinestone wakes up and cuddles Pee Wee for 30 minutes
8:30am Rhinestone and her BF/Baby Daddy take lil Wee for a walk
9:30am Pee Wee watches Rhinestone shower
9:30-10:30am Everyone eats, gets ready and leaves the house- Pee Wee follows Rhinestone’s every movement… taking only one small break to play with his favorite toy… an ear plug.
10:30am Rhinestone, Baby Daddy and Pee Wee go to work- Pee Wee rides on Rhinestone’s lap and rest his head on her belly.
10:45- 2:00pm Pee Wee sleeps on Rhinestone’s lap…. well he tries…. her lap is being overtaken by a baby belly bump.
2:00-3:00pm Lunch and Pee Wee walk. Pee Wee barks at anyone who looks at Rhinestone.
3:00-9:00pm Pee Wee sits on lap, follows Rhinestone, goes to rehearsal… chases Heavenly Spies….. cries to be held etc.
9:00pm Pee Wee mini walk with Mother Rhinestone.
10:00pm Pee Wee plays with an ear plug, eats dinner and cuddles Agent Rhinestone ALL night long.
As you can see…. Rhinestone centers her life around her pup. She can’t even go on a vacation without worrying about leaving him behind…. WHAT WILL HAPPEN WHEN Rhinestone has an actual baby? Poor Wee will feel so left out…. Perhaps he needs obedience school now. He already barks when Rhinestone goes near her BF/Baby Daddy. He hates competition. She tries to train him by carrying a doll around the house…. and he wimpers at the site of it…. begging to be held. Rhinestone has created a mini Pee Wee dog monster.
Agent Rhinestone can’t help but feeling like Baby from ‘Dirty Dancing’ when she says “I carried a watermelon”.
Not only does Rhinestone crave watermelons all day everyday…. she looks like she is smuggling one under the tight maternity tee she paid way tooooo much for at A Pea in the Pod.
Well… It seems Agent Rhinestone is averaging about 1 blog entry per year these days… but she will attempt to catch you up!
1. Agent Rhinestone and her BF are expecting a baby boy on August 14th of 2010. What! Time to exchange her rhinestone pasties for a nursing-bouncing-babe and her favorite heeled boots for a er, ah….. a lower pair of heeled boots.
2. Another big change is the addition of the new fam business: www.fredwildliferefuge.com
3. Umm…also…. Agent Rhinestone is playing Mother to The Heavenly Spies. She does hair, schedules shows and makes up dances…. same as usual… she just doesn’t dance on stage right now. Which is a new sort of adventure. Her legs twitch when she watches the girls dance… which will probs nev go away…. so she plans on performing again immed after the mini rhinestone is birthed… unless….. she develops… stretch marks. Which leads her to her next story.
Once upon a time (this morning)… Agent Rhinestone took a walk with her signif oth and then came home and popped into the shower. Upon emerging from the shower she looked in the mirror and saw 2 deep purple-ish looking marks on her lower belly. Stretch Marks! What! How did they develop over night???? She slathered on cocoa butter, threw on her fuzzy teal robe and ran from the bathroom in a fit of tears…. screaming “I am ruined!!!” She cried in her signif oth’s lap for an hour and mourned the loss of midriff showing costumes and days spent at the beach in a bikini. He tried his best to comfort her.
Fast Forward 2 hours later. Agent Rhinestone…. sat at her desk at work feeling some what resolved. She lifted up her shirt to check on her new stretch mark friend and low and behold it was gone. It had just been a mark from the waistband of her sweat pants. Oh…. I guess she was mistaken.
She still isn’t in the clear yet and if she actually does develop stretch marks…. she’ll never blog about it.
Love, Agent Rhino.
1. family old and new
2. wonderful friends old and new
3. a warm little spot to sit
4. chandeliers
5. puppies
6. sequin ugg’s.
Sometimes Agent Rhinestone gets inquiries about what music was used in a show. The Heavenly Spies latest show MATA HARI includes a bajilion songs…. but these are the main ones! Happy Listening!
“What’s a girl gotta do” Basement Jaxx
“Underwear” The Magnetic Fields
“Ringa Ringa” AR Rahman
“Scars” Basement Jaxx
“I am Naked” Stereo Total
“Call of Hagar” Watcha Clan
“Smokey Taboo” Coco Rosie
“Mary Jane” Major Laser
“Jimmy” M.I.A
“Pigalle” Patricia Kaas
“Nature’s Wrath” Budos Band
“I think Some body Should Call the Love Doctor” Stereo Total
“Stepp’n up” M.I.A
“The Moon Asked the Crow” Coco Rosie
“Something Bigger, Something Better” Amanda Blank
All of a sudden winter is upon Agent Rhinestone. She is huddled in front of a tiny heater typing away on her hot pink laptop. Occassionaly she has to put her hands under the sleeping pup Pee Wee on her lap… almost like a living black fur muff!
She is looking forward to the cold months of Seattle though… afterall…. she can now do the following things:
wear fur coats (duh, only vintage and faux.)
wear boots
buy Pee Wee a faux fur coat to layer over his natch fur coat
buy Pee Wee boots. (He hates to get his mini feet wet.)
Someday Rhinestone and Pee Wee will be completely matching just like these people! Great! (Maybe in the summer time….)
Well, Bye.
Agent Rhinestone has found herself in a whole new world. She left her little apartment for 1 on Cap Hill and moved into a new little abode on the water with her cuddly pup Pee Wee and even cuddlier BF. She spent 3 whole months working with El Capitan BF to make their home the swellest place on earth. The walls are different hues of pink, magenta, golden and tiffany’s box turquoise. The kitchen is complete with original 1950’s cupboards and a black and white checkered floor and there are actual chandies in every room. What. Rhinestone even found a golden tufted velvet headboard for the bedroom. Like totally.
Well for now… the house is still kinda cray cray with boxes but it should like totally up and running soon!
In other news…. Agent Rhinestone and her spy BFF’s are working really hard on their all new show MATA HARI. It is coming together as shows often do…. in a flurry of sequins, thongs, pasties and rhinestone’d head dresses. Which…. P.S… Agent Rhinestone purchased the craziest head dress at the Greg Thompson sale this year. She can’t look at herself in the mirror without laughing… but it was like totally worth it! It looks like a silver helmet with feathers shooting like a bullet stream from the top center. Wow.
Anyway- that’s all. Bye.
Agent Rhinestone thinks this article by Dan Savage is quite amusing. It’s not the actual article that amuses her it is the volume of comments below it! Which is most likely because of the sheer magnitude of burlesque performers in Seattle…
http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/the-burlesque-shoah/Content?oid=4399613
Agent Rhinestone pondered leaving a comment but…. she wouldn’t really know what to say. She is a burlesque dancer I suppose, although she considers herself more of a dancer that loves sparkles. When she started producing neo-cabaret style shows a little over 5 years ago in Seattle… she craved support from the burlesque community but never really seemed to fit in. Perhaps it was because the shows she produced sometimes had nothing to do with burlesque… but if you are a performer in Seattle you automatically get pigeon holed under the title “burlesque”. Brendan Kiley from The Stranger came to a full length show that The Heavenly Spies produced last year at Can Can. The show was not burlesque… not one pastie came into view and Kiley called it “Burlesque for the whole family.”
Agent Rhinestone loves burlesque and likes to use elements of burlesque in her shows but often finds herself irritated by the influx of humans in this town that call themselves performers. It seems to have turned into a mutual admiration society of sorts….
I suppose everyone does look great in sparkles…. but DANG!
Anyway… That is Agent Rhinestone’s 2 cents for the day.
bye.
